I'm not ready!

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I've always thought I was average height. Maybe this thinking all these years was to mentally comfort myself because I'm still the same height I was at 14. I’m 5.4” and proud!  However I'm being overshadowed by my 12 year old son. Yes, I expect the child to grow but I’m not ready for the eye to eye contact part. Especially when I have to reprimand him for something.

It almost feels like he is trying to square up on me! And I’m almost like I want to knock this boy out for bringing all that attitude and front! (You know how mentally lose yourself as a parent sometimes, but don't show it!) Don’t get me wrong though my boy is good and I raise my children with words not hands, as that is my personal choice. I have no real issues with my son. Other than I'm trying really really really hard to understand how he can be so academically smart but appear to have no common sense in the home. I comfort myself with the thought that with age the common sense part will catch up. Trust me, I pray on this daily!

My son just like all other boys his age is going through puberty I get that from a fact of life point of view.  But damn it's scary for Mum's, and probably for Dad's too, seeing your little boy physically change into a little man. There should be a support group, or NHS leaflet or something that prepares you for this. Mentally and emotionally to me he is still my baby but he’s in some little man's body. What is that? I mean slow down or something!

First it's jumping two shoe sizes in a year. Then it's the mirror time and all the muscle man posing and talk of 6 and 8 packs. Oh and let's not forget every 2 months he comes showing me his top lip, whilst trying to convince me his mustache is coming. And now it’s the height thing. I mean come on man! When his voice breaks I swear I'm just going to leave home!

But seriously though, this takes some mental adjustment, as his appearance may be changing quickly but the age is still moving at the same pace. And I have to parent according to his age no matter how big and tall he gets. As a Mum it starts to get real to you that your son will become a man and this is just the preview of what he will look like. I now have to ensure that l help him emotionally, mentally and morally into becoming the best man he can be. I have long road ahead of me I know. But damn, I’m not ready yet!  

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